When You Don’t Feel Ready
Esther – For Such a Time as This Day 1: When You Don’t Feel Ready Key Verse: "Who knows but that you have come to your royal position for such a time as this?" — Esther 4:14 (NIV)
We’ve Met Her Before... If you’ve been around Sunday school, you’ve probably met Esther already — maybe via a flannel board cutout, a VeggieTales queen with a tiara, or a women’s retreat where everyone wore crowns and talked about “royalty.” But I want you to pause for a second. Because the real Esther? She was a survivor. A strategist. A woman with trembling hands and a terrified heart… who still said yes. She was a Jewish orphan living in exile. She was taken into a king’s harem — not by choice. And she was crowned queen of Persia not because of her qualifications… but because God had a plan.
The Original Bachelor (Persia Edition) Let’s set the stage. The king, Xerxes, just banished his queen because she wouldn’t come dance for him and his drunk party guests (honestly, good for her). So, the royal court held a year-long search for a new queen. Esther didn’t audition. She was taken. Historical records tell us these “contestants” went through 12 months of beauty treatments. A whole year of oils, spices, and preparation — but for what? To spend one night with a king who might never call for them again. This isn’t a fairy tale. It’s an ancient power structure dressed up with perfume and gold. And yet — God was moving. Quietly. Powerfully. Strategically.
Ready or Not… If you’ve ever felt: Unqualified Unseen Unequipped Unprepared Or like God got the wrong girl… …then you’re exactly who God tends to call. God’s greatest works are often done through the ones who feel the least ready. That’s what makes Esther’s story so stunning. Not her strength — but her surrender.
Spiritual Spotlight: Hester Panim – The Hidden Face of God Did you know that the name “Esther” is rooted in the Hebrew word “s-t-r,” which means to hide? Not once in the book of Esther is God's name mentioned. Not. One. Time. Yet His fingerprints are everywhere. Jewish tradition calls this Hester Panim — the hidden face of God. When we can’t see Him, don’t feel Him, and wonder if He’s even in the room… He’s there. Quietly orchestrating redemption.
My Real “Not Ready” Moment I’ve had many “I’m not ready” moments in my life — but one stands out above the rest. I wasn’t ready to forgive someone who had done incredibly horrible things to me. Things so painful I won’t even mention them here, because they won’t help anyone and, by God’s grace, I’ve already forgiven them. I didn’t know how to start. I was filled with righteous anger. And the truth is — I would never have been ready. But if I was going to follow Christ — the One I said yes to so many years ago — I had to do it all the way. And forgiveness? That’s not optional. It’s a command. “Forgive as the Lord forgave you.” — Colossians 3:13 “If you forgive other people... your heavenly Father will also forgive you.” — Matthew 6:14 I asked God, “If You want me to do this, You’re going to have to show me how.” And then it came to me. I bought a blank journal. And every single day for an entire year, I wrote out a prayer for the person I could not stand. Sometimes I asked God to bless her. Other times, I asked Him to help her see what she had done to me. But I kept writing. Day after day. Week after week. Month after month. And somewhere along the way… something began to shift. I started to see her pain. Her brokenness. I started to feel compassion. I realized she was human — deeply flawed, yes — but in need of grace and healing just like me. At the end of that year, I thought about mailing her the journal. Instead, I tossed it into the fireplace and watched it burn. Every page. Every word. Every angry thought turned prayer. Gone. Just like my sin — as far as the east is from the west (Psalm 103:12). I wasn’t ready. But God met me in the “not ready.” And I walked out lighter, freer, and more whole than I ever thought possible.
What’s Coming This week we’ll explore what it means to: Step into divine purpose Speak up when it counts Seek wise counsel Choose courage over comfort And trust that God has placed you exactly where you are — for such a time as this.
Reflection Questions Where in your life are you waiting to “feel ready”? Is there someone God is calling you to forgive? What’s stopping you? What if God’s hidden hand is at work right now — preparing you for your moment?
Prayer God, I don’t always feel ready. But I know You are with me — in the unknown, in the fear, and in the “not yets.” Give me courage to obey, even when I don’t understand. Teach me to forgive like You forgave me. Help me show up — for such a time as this. Amen.
